Giving your children freedom

In the modern world with news appearing regularly about child abduction or worse its hard to know how much freedom to give your children. You want to find a balance between giving them independence and keeping them safe.

When I lived in Hastings my children were younger but it was also 4 times the size of Kendal. If we were in town I'd keep my children close by as it was always busy. Our house was on an inner ring road where most traffic didn't keep to the 30 limit. I could never let my children out the front without me.

Since moving up to Cumbria we have found things different. For one we live in a cul de sac on a quiet estate where children can play in the street or the local park with minimal supervision. Once they had shown they had road sense they could cycle on the closest roads or run errands to the post box. They know exactly how far they are allowed to go and it's nearly always with a friend.

The town itself is much quieter and its only on special occasions that it gets crowded. It's much easier to see the children from a distance and it feels so much safer. I have been building up letting my children have more freedom and responsibility whilst in town. Things like my daughter going into a shop or library on her own.

Today there's was the next step. As we were doing the advent fair at our church on the edge of the shopping area I sent my daughter to McDonalds on her own to get breakfast. It's only a few minutes walk and the roads she crossed are either quiet or have a crossing. As it was early in the day it was even quieter than normal. I have to admit to thinking about her the whole time she was gone but it gave her a feeling of being thought of as responsible and grown up.

How do you strike the balance with your children or do you find that you clip their wings to ensure they stay safe?

Is it time to be a paranoid parent?

I found out yesterday that someone tried to abduct my friend's 3 year old in our town centre last week. Subsequently I was told that apparently there were several such attempts that day in the town.


Until now I haven't really contemplated that some stranger would try and abduct one of my kids as we go about our normal lives. Its something that happens to other people in other places.


Since last night I have wanted to keep my children much closer to me when I we are out in busy places. All this without turning my children into nervous wrecks. I tried to explain to my 6 year old daughter today why she wasn't allowed to go choose an outside table at McDonald's whilst I was still waiting for food. I said that someone had tried to take our little friend as they wanted a child. She asked if people that already had children sometimes took other people's - I had to reply maybe. 


It is hard to clip my children's wings but the number one priority has to be to keep them safe...

As I was writing this I clicked on a link on Twitter to a story of 9 year old girl who has gone missing after been sent to the shop isn't that something our children should be able to do safely?

What a day!

Well it started well (despite the horrible weather!) with E to school on time and not much hassle getting everyone up & out.

I made more progress on the attic and had some lovely time with O (including cooking) and then....

He got overconfident on the attic stairs just as I turned away for a 2nd and crash, scream. Luckily he recovered after a cuddle & cold compress but he had hit a sander at the bottom of the stairs... He insisted on swimming etc and we carried on as normal.

E was v good at swimming but I then noticed the mark on O's head - perfectly matching the edge of the sander! So quick dash home to try and feed everyone before off to A&E. Luckily 1) Conquest wasn't busy 2) O was given clean bill of health plus a free teddy & lolly [big sis got one too!]

So scary but in the end OK. Thing is having stairgates wouldn't help as I would have had to open them to get down myself. Guess I will need to put one up at the bottom of the stairs from now on though to stop him going up there without supervision...