The Dilemma of the Single Working Parent

I was very relieved earlier this to get a term time only part time job. It was great no longer being almost fully reliant on the state. Not receiving maintenance from my ex for the children had meant that we had very little money. The income from my blog was negligible as its mostly in form of review items and days out. I also hadn't reestablished my Usborne book business after moving north.

The job is only 20 hours a week and even though I have to put my children in after school club it is well worth doing both financially and mentally! It left me a couple of hours each morning to get all the chores done and carry on blogging.

Back in September I was offered extra work at another school on a temporary basis to cover staff absence. This seemed like a great idea as it would mean more money. It did mean that I lost 3 mornings in which everything else got done.

Now I'm not sure it's a good thing to be doing. It doesn't really equate to more much more money as of course I'm quite rightly entitled to smaller benefit payments. Unfortunately the way they work these out is confusing and I don't really know what's happening with them. Because my payments from the extra work vary my benefit is different every month and I have to keep visiting the benefits office to prove every change!

The rest of my life seems to be always on the rush. Things aren't getting done and I know that right now my kids need more time with me rather than me getting stressed and being busy. Because the difference in pay isn't really enough to make a huge difference to our lives I am debating axing the extra work. I don't want to be a burden to tax payers but something is going to give if I carry on this way and its probably my sanity!

With my children being my responsibility 7 days a week I do have to put them first.

Reasons to be Cheerful XIV (#R2BC)

First week of the school holidays has been a roller coaster as those of you that know me on Facebook and Twitter are well aware! However I can still find reasons to smile:
1) Me time

I ran off down south for 36 hours without my kids to celebrate the last of my school chum's 40th birthdays. It was great to be able to relax (and have someone on Megabus mistake me for a 20 something!). Seeing good friends - some of whom I hadn't seen for over 8 years - in an adult only environment was a great way to unwind and recharge my batteries. 

2) The weather


Its been amazingly good since the kids broke up from school. This has meant that we've been able to enjoy lots of outside time. Living up here there are so many things to do outdoors and its so much better than being cooped up inside for days on end. So far we've been to Brockhole and Abbott Hall Park and we are hoping to do lots more if the weather holds.

3) Money


After nearly a month of stress over my benefits my persistent phone calls have finally resulted in them being restored with back-payments. Turns out my "rapid reclaim" a) been sent to wrong section b) been sat on by the Decisions Manager for over 2 weeks. Just need my Housing Benefit to be restored next week and then I can balance the books again. Nice to be able to spend time over the summer with kids and not have to worry about money for a while.


4) My garden


My mum came round yesterday and helped me make a big difference to my garden. We pulled out lots of weeds and she put in some spare bedding plants from her garden. Even the kids helped us. With my neighbour's father-in-law having mowed my front lawn on Tuesday (can you tell they are trying to sell their house!) the whole outside of my house is looking better to go with our stunning views:

Reasons to be Cheerful XVI (#R2BC)

Well after last week's stresses I really need to emphasise the positive and keep on smiling!
1) Academic success
I have had confirmation that I passed my Preparing To Teach in the Lifelong Learning Sector certificate. This doesn't qualify me to actually teach but its an initial step giving me the confidence to look into doing a Certificate in Teaching in the Lifelong Learning Sector in the Autumn. It also helps to give me confidence in teaching people to do family history for my Kendal Family History Services.
My son also really enjoyed his 2 taster sessions at his new primary school and I couldn't get him out of his new uniform! Think he is ready for it all so just hope its not too tiring when they start for real on September 7th after 7 weeks of no school...
2) Sorting out my benefits
The real human beings at Kendal Job centre have got me back on the system after the Carlisle office took me off last week. They have said that in future they will fax any documents for me to the DWP so that there is a record of them being sent as things "often' go missing! My MP Tim Farron has written to the Secretary of State to complain about the way I have been treated so I hope that this can stop it happening to people in more vulnerable positions than me.
3) Family fun
I had enough left from my lottery win to treat my kids to their first ever visit to the circus as Circus Vegas are in town this week. We took advantage of the first night cheap tickets and queued for an hour to guarantee ring side seats (a choice I would later regret!). It was a really good mix of things to make you gasp and to make you laugh. At times the looks on my kids' faces was priceless. Of course sitting on the front row we ended up being squirted by the clowns and I ended up with the comedy trampolinist almost on my lap! 

the amazing sword balancing lady - yes that is a dagger in her mouth balancing a sword!

4) My weight

Despite all the stress and still no exercise I actually lost 1/2 a pound this week. A micro step in the right direction and I just need to get myself re-motivated especially with the school holidays coming up..
5) Saying it with flowers
I looked after my parents' house whilst they were on holiday and my mum sent me some gorgeous flowers from Scilly to say thank you:

They have pride of place in my newly sorted kitchen (not completely finished but a whole lot better!) which is another reason I'm cheerful this week!

Benefit Breakdown

Let me start this post by saying that I am glad I live in a country where there is a safety net for people like me who find themselves temporarily unable to work or earn enough money to feed their family and keep a roof over their heads. For the last 18 months I have been able to concentrate on getting my children through some tough times and relocating 350 miles to be near my family.


However government cost cutting has suddenly descended me into a very stressful nightmare. At the beginning of May I sent off a 13-14 page set of accounts showing the small amounts of money I had earned in previous tax year. Then I relaxed thinking I didn't need to provide any information for 6 months unless my fortunes changed dramatically and I started taking more than £20 a week.


So you can imagine my shock and horror yesterday when a letter popped through my door from the local council informing me that "you are no longer eligible for Income Support"  and so would not be eligible for Housing Benefit! A quick phone call to them revealed that the DWP had informed them of my ineligibility the day before...


Right I thought let's call the DWP and find out why? Is it because one of my children had creeped over the savings threshold? Typically it was strike day so calling the DWP entailed an even longer than normal phone call and the person I spoke to wasn't a normal call centre person. They informed me that as I had failed to send in my business accounts as requested they had written to me on the 24th telling me that my Income Support claim was invalid. So in the nearly 2 months since I sent the documentation they hadn't seen fit to ask me where the documents where and I had no idea they hadn't had them until they cut off my benefit...


So to get it re-instated as a Rapid application I then had to call another DWP department (at least this time a freephone number!). Another long bit on hold due to staff on strike and then the very nice man arranged for me to have a sign on interview on Monday at my local job centre. Only problem was not enough time to send me the right forms but apparently I could pick one up from the job centre today. Oh and did I want to complain about what happened? At this point not wanting to rock the boat I said no and breathed a sigh that maybe things would get sorted (albeit with a 14 day delay).


Last night was a pretty sleepless one as I thought about the consequences of losing free school meals, housing benefit and uniform grant etc. whilst it was sorted. Today I rolled up to the Job Centre feeling like it was a positive step (with 4 year old in tow) and asked for the relevant form. First lady hadn't heard of it so went to consult a colleague. This colleague went to look for said form and the message came back we used to have them but don't any more. So it was on the phone from the job centre to the DWP:

it's because you failed to send in the documents we requested

Aargh - ever feel like people don't listen to you or that they don't record previous conversations on the computer systems that control their very thoughts? Realising I needed to speak to a human being and not an autobot I asked for the number of the other call centre. 

As each attempt on that number either ended with the telephone system cutting me off, sending me to a strange tone or giving me false hope with several minutes on hold before cutting me off; my morale plummeted and with the previous sleepless night tears started flowing.

At this point I have to say how fab the Kendal Job Centre team were. The security guard gave me tissues, the first lady consulted with the senior man, he went off and got me a different form that would give them the basics to sort me out on Monday. This does give me hope that everything will get sorted when real humans are involved.

I know that there are plenty of people out there taking the mick with benefits and who have no intention of working and that is what this abrupt system is supposed to weed out. I am trying to find ways to get myself off benefits and to independence but at the moment I need the Income Support. My self employed businesses need re-building and establishing having relocated to the other end of the country. As an alterative I keep looking in the local papers etc for paid work but up here it nearly all involves evening or weekend work which is useless as a single parent.

So Mr Cameron by all means balance the books by weeding out the benefit cheats and the work shy but treating honest people like I've been treated is not at all humane. It has caused immense stress to me which has knocked on to my children who have had to witness my phone calls etc. Please treat us like human beings and not just numbers that can be axed to balance the books. Maybe if you allowed information to be sent by e-mail to back up claims then it would save money as well as the angst of things getting lost in the post.

I really hope that things get resolved for me on Monday and I've got everything back in place. Luckily for me I actually had some spare money in my account for a change so will not feel the financial bite unless it takes longer than 14 days to fix. I can imagine that for many people having their Income Support removed would lead to real financial hardship as well as the stress.


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Update 20/07/11


Yesterday as it was more than 2 weeks since placing my Rapid reclaim and I had no reply I contacted the DWP. I was told that my claim was lodged with the Decisions Manager on 12th July and it was in a pile of chronologically ordered requests. All I can do is wait.


In the meantime the council want proof of the re-instatement by the 27th so that I don't lose my housing benefit completely! I also have to pay my rent on 1st August so getting nervous and I may be calling the Crisis Loan line if this goes on much longer...

Thrifty Tuesday

As a single parent I am now really feeling the pinch of a much reduced household income plus having to responsibility for all household outgoings. Unfortunately I've not been able to earn much recently and a lack of maintenance payments means I am coping on state benefits which aren't designed to fund a lavish lifestyle. So I am having to learn how to live a more thrifty life (not always successfully!) here are few ideas about how to make sure income isn't outstripped by expenditure.


Know what is coming in/out and when


I have written on the calendar when my various benefits and credits come in. Some are weekly, some fortnightly and some 4 weekly which makes life more complicated! Alongside these I have put when the bills and direct debits are paid. This way I don't get caught out and always have enough in my account to pay them. As the biggest expense is rent I have to make sure that I keep the Housing Benefit in the eSavings bit of my online account until the night before its due. That way it can't get taken up by anything else.


Planning ahead


With the help of my children we try and menu plan for the week ahead based upon what is on their schedules. This means that I can create an online supermarket order using this plan and what we have in the cupboards/freezer/fridge. If we are going to be out and about taking a snack pack with us saves on expensive emergency food/drink buys.


Planning ahead can also apply to travel and days out. Booking up to 12 weeks in advance can save a fortune in train tickets. Some attractions offer discounts if you book online before the day of your visit. Other places offer cheaper prices on certain days so its worth checking this out well in advance.