Showing posts with label divorce. Show all posts
Showing posts with label divorce. Show all posts

Thursday, 9 June 2011

Reasons to be Cheerful XII (#R2BC)


Reasons to be Cheerful at Mummy from the Heart

I've got plenty of reasons to be cheerful this week!

1) My Holiday

As you may have seen I spent a chunk of last week on my prize holiday in Mallorca with my mum and my kids. It was great taking my kids abroad for the first time ever and even though it rained every day it was a real treat and experience for the grown ups too.

2) My Future

Whilst I was away my decree absolute came through so I'm now free to really start my life over and no longer live in a weird limbo of separated. It doesn't make that much of a difference to my day to day life but its taken so long to get this far I'm happy its finally at an end.

3) Work

The kids and I had a lovely day at the Station Inn in Oxenholme during the Companion Dog Show and Family Fun day last weekend. We may not have sold a lot of books, but I got the tan I didn't get on holiday and the kids had lots of fun. Next to us were the lovely Sean and Gill from Treasure Trails Cumbria so it was a very sociable day.

4) Party in the Park





This Sunday I'll be helping out at my first ever Party in the Park in Kendal. Its a completely free event for the residents of Kendal organised by my church St Thomas' Kendal. There will be bouncy castles, face painting, brass bands, ice creams, cakes and tea (and more!) and its all completely free. Lots of us are busy baking cakes for the tea tent and we're all praying for a sunny day from 1-5 in Maude's Meadow in Kendal. 


Friday, 8 October 2010

Is the honeymoon over?

Since I came back from my enforced divorce trip down south my daughter has not been herself at all. She has:

  • been more bolshy, 
  • been attention seeking at school, 
  • been in trouble at school for hitting other children, 
  • has had to be dragged out from under my bed to go to school
  • has had major temper tantrums
  • told me she was lying about liking her new school she "hates it"
Her teacher has asked me to have a meeting about her to discuss the issue. This is more like she was behaving before we moved.

Thursday, 16 September 2010

Reasons to be cheerful

Our home


Is lovely! A perfect sized home for the three of us in a nice quiet street. We have really friendly neighbours and the kids can play outside safely. Its a lovely walk into town from the house.


Schools


My daughter has settled in really well at her new school. She has made new friends and seems really happy. Her reading is becoming very confident. She is enjoying the class Our Body topic and loves telling me all about it.


My son seems to be loving his new nursery and has a new best friend, although they have already argued over a girl! He won't be in for full sessions until the end of the month but its looking promising so far.


I have been meeting lots of the other parents and they have been very welcoming. We have all had fun after school in the village playground with other families.


Family


It is fantastic being so close to my parents and other family members. Being able to have them pop over is lovely. My children are really enjoying having their grandparents very involved in their lives.


Church


We have all been enjoying our new church and have been made very welcome and the children are very happy in their Sunday School. I have been able to join a mum's spiritual coffee morning mid week which is fabulous. Afterwards the children were able to socialise and O seemed to make some more friends.


Divorce


The end is in sight as the Nisi has been declared. Just the financial aspects to be resolved before its all over and I can fully start over afresh.

Wednesday, 21 April 2010

Preparing to move on

Up until I fell like I've been treading water or even sometimes going backwards as far as being able to move on from the break of my marriage. I am in that limbo situation of being stuck in the old family home surrounded by the accumulated stuff from a family of 7 and finding it impossible to sort it out.


Now with help from my parents, in-laws and good friends I have started to see a difference around the house. Some of the things that are no longer needed have been either sold, given away or thrown out. A few of the things that we do want in the future are already boxed up and some are being stored in my parents' garage. Rooms are beginning to look clearer though to a newcomer its still chaotic. I have a plan of action as to what needs to go done next. It's like one of those puzzles that you have to do in the right order!


I have also got verbal agreement on a house to rent near my parents. It is a lovely little place with just the right amount of space for a family of 3 plus hamster. It was initially going to be let furnished but she has very kindly agreed to remove her furniture so I can bring some of mine. The house is in a cul-de-sac so the kids will be able to play safely outside on their bikes. A huge field behind the house has public access and it is adjacent to a playground. All in all a lovely place to bring up young kids. The current plan is to move in on the 1st of August so the kids will be on holiday from school.


I was hoping to get my daughter into the school less than 15 minutes walk away but it is full. So instead I will be driving her out 5 miles to a village school which is twice the size of her current school but still only 150 pupils. She seemed really taken with it when she saw it. My son has a place reserved at a fantastic council nursery school which he is referring to as his "writing school".


We are all so excited about the move as are the rest of my family that are already up there. It is going to be a whole new chapter in our lives and help us all to move on.


I also heard today that there has finally been progress in the divorce and the court has issued some papers to my husband. Hopefully this means that by next month the Nisi will be through. I just want it all done & dusted so I can start again.

Wednesday, 24 February 2010

Together we are stronger

The last 48 hours have shown me the strength of love & support I have from my friends and family. Other people that have been through similar situations have told me that this is the worst stage of a divorce when you are in a limbo between being married and being able to start again.


The support I am getting both off & online is helping me through the transition. Phone calls, e-mails, messages on FB & Twitter and real life hugs are all a great help. My kids give me so much love and tell me things such as:


you are the best mummy ever

they love snuggling up to me in bed or on the sofa and E is doing her best to help me as much as a 6 year old can. 

I do still have my concerns about them, E couldn't make her mind up whether she wanted to speak to her daddy on Sunday and chose eating tea over getting home in time. Then when I tried to set-up the Skype call she said rude things about her dad but was upset when she couldn't talk to him. The fact that the only way she has of direct contact with him is through Skype is very frustrating to a young child.



O has an interesting twist to much of his role play which maybe his way of dealing things. He was playing with ducks in the bath and told granny that the ducks were mummy, brother & sister. When asked were daddy duck was he said that the daddy had drowned. When he plays with his sister's dolls he insists that he is their mummy and not their daddy. At playgroup today he was creating family groups of animals - none of them had a daddy in. Even the farmer was the brother of the little boy figure and not the father.

I am hoping that the lady from the advice group can offer me constructive advice on how to get the kids through this. But until then I am going to adopt a new motto for the kids and I:

Together we are stronger

thanks to Josie at Sleep is for the Weak for this week's Writing Workshop prompt!